Friday, November 5, 2010

Halloween

So I was a devil girl for Halloween...a flirty (some could think of another word, I imagine) devil girl, pink and black. As always, it was a bit of a nerve-wracking moment as I drove out to a college town hours distant from home, wondering if I'd actually go through with it, though this was my third year straight going "out and about" for Halloween.

I ended up changing in my car in a mall parking lot. It's sad how good I've gotten at changing in a car. I put the costume on head to toe, cycling in my female clothing and out my male clothing. The water balloon breasts, the belts around my midsection, the cute wig. I did my makeup from the foundation up, and made sure the wig was just right. The worst thing? Those damn glue-on super long nails. The only thing worse than the 15 minutes to glue them on properly was the 40 minutes to properly take them off at the end of the night. Eventually, as darkness fell, I was in costume. What do on this 40-degree night?

Well, Halloween is wasted without trick-or-treating. I did find a residential neighborhood near some dorms, hoping that the residents would be accustomed to seeing older people in costume. Maybe they'd think I was a college kid? Tough to tell under all the makeup, here's hoping. There's a bit of an art to it, as well, because the last thing a man needs is to be thought of creeping around a neighborhood filled with kids, so it was an endeavor to find a neighborhood largely deserted. A spot of candy the kids hadn't found yet. Eventually, I did find such a spot. My heels clicking on the ground, the ribbon sash at my waist swishing, the large wings glittering behind me...I was quite a sight. I could see my shadow in the streetlight, and it was almost enough to make it work, as my devil tail swung lazily as I walked, slowly looping side to side.

House one...had a candy dish outside with a note. House two looked much better. I nervously minced down the brick sidewalk...only to find the same deal. House three? Another unattended dish. I was surprised they hadn't been emptied out. Finally, house four had a door. I rang the bell, and a dog went nuts. I'm standing there, silhouetted by the light coming through, wondering if the resident is waiting me out. Eventually, a woman comes to the door...and plays it straight. I smile and declare "trick or treat", and she merely goes through her candy dish. She drops off a few selections in my pale pink candy bucket, and closes the door. No word on my costume. Heck, she barely saw my curtsey. I don't think she was put off, but given her accent I suspect that she was new to the country and gamely trying to deal with the bizarre American tradition that was Halloween.

I got more satisfaction at the supermarket where I bought some...angel food cake mix. I waited in line with my pink purse, pitchfork, and selection. The cashier smiled broadly, telling my that my costume was "intense". A fellow customer, a tough-looking Hispanic guy, said I "won the prize" (was he coming on to me?) Later on, at another supermarket where I fought some devil's food cake mix, I heard a gasp of laughter behind me with a small voice saying "what is that costume, mommy?" I ended up at the self-serve checkout, but could feel people's eyes behind me.

In McDonald's, I got the usual disbelieving smiles before a bunny girl told me how much she loved my costume and insisted on a photo. My wings clipped a display on the way by, bringing it down. Whoops! Similar thumbs-up in Walmart. Frankly, the main disappointment was waiting in line at Walmart, when somebody was getting his stuff together, and tells the cashier "why don't you let this guy go first". This guy? Don't you see the glittery skirt?

One final run into a Domino's, where a cashier was nearly hysterical with laughter, and I called it a night. I did pose for increasingly flirtateous self-pics in a parking lot (and no, you may not see them). Overall, it was a wonderful experience, but again I hope that someday someone comes along to push me further. I did walk down a street in the chill...but I'd love to pose there. Do my makeup outside. Try to get photos with people. Maybe next year. Another legacy of the episode are the two ferocious blisters on my toes. Shoes, not the best fit.

PS: One fun thing is to see how people on YouTube describe their costumes...a few girls/women there are my idols.. "this year I'm a slutty pirate"..."this skirt is super super short"..."I look so cute!"...

4 comments:

  1. Your'e a great inspiration and I'm glad to hear you had fun. We always wish we could have done more, but you have done more than most. Keep up the good work for the rest of us!

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  2. Who are your idols on youtube would love to get girlie tips from the best :)

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  3. Glad you had a great time.

    I chickened out at doing something girly for Halloween, didn't find a costume in time plus I didn't like the thought of getting on a bus in it all.

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  4. @Anon...I just blazed through YouTube, didn't keep any links. Just search "My costume" and you can see lots of choices.

    Terri, it's honestly not a matter of chickening out. It's as if the population collectively loses its mind...no gender roles are enforced, at least in the liberal Northeast US.

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