Sunday, October 23, 2016

Thank you and good-bye

This is the 437th and last post of this blog.  I started this blog over seven years ago to tell a story.  The story of my fantasy life, of being subject (with my permission) to clever, insidious constraints on my behavior that would push toward the stereotypical behavior of a girl.   I learned long ago that I cannot write fiction with any length as I don't have the patience to include necessary details, so this blog was launched to provide ongoing short fiction of that vein.

Some posts have been successful, some not as much.  I have been contacted by an occasional person who used some of my ideas on themselves, or on a person they were in relationship with who had similar interests.  This blog also was the way that I heard from a couple people who had varying levels of interest in having me play out those ideas.  Sure, there was a hope that someone could see these stories as the basis of contacting me to really get into this lifestyle, but it never happened.  There were a couple abortive attempts to start something, but a lot of people chickened out.  Fact is, unless this is very thin window dressing for homosexual behavior, most people aren't interested. (It always confused me to contact people who called themselves cross-dressers but wanted to be naked all the time.  It's no problem that you're gay or bisexual, accept it.)   At times, I detailed some real-life experiences, particularly on Halloween.  I loved the ridiculous, needlessly elaborate and quietly degrading costumes available at the time.  For years, I'd go out in public in costume.

Well, it says something I'm not dressing up for Halloween this year.  I've aged out of being able to live this fantasy with any shadow of plausibility.  I'm even too old to credibly claim my social circle makes some of these wagers.   My professional and personal lives are less and less compatible.   I haven't posted here for months.

Most blogs die quietly, without an end.   Something in me doesn't want that to happen.  The phase of my life that this blog represents and aspired to is at its end, so this blog is, too.  I've met some wonderful people, read some thrilling writing in the occasional comment.  Some good memories will push me to keep this blog up for now.  I'm still alive; that email address still works.  But these are my last words here.

I'll finish with this.  It amuses me to remember of the number of stories I read with the same plot -- boy dresses as a girl, evidence is procured, and threats to put it online compels him to go deeper into that hole under the guidance of his tormentor.  Today?  Plenty of guys are pursuing gender fluidity, and even those that crossdress on a dare or as a joke put it online.  Fortunate are so many children dealing with what I dealt with as a child -- our world is more accepting.  I hope it keeps embracing all, more so by the day.